Effects of Domestic Violence

There are various effects of domestic violence not only on the victim him or herself but also on the victim's children, their family members and friends.

What are the effects on the victim?

• Serious injury (joint damage, broken bones), health problems (insomnia, chronic pain, STD’s) or death
• depression, suicidal feelings, low self-esteem, feeling ashamed or worthless, self-hate, anger or difficulty regulating feelings
• Difficulty trusting people or developing relationships with others after escaping abusive relationship
• Uses coping mechanisms to put up with abuse such as pretending that it is not happening. She or he may also turn to alcohol and drugs so as not to feel the physical and emotional pain
• May feel like they are to blame – it is their fault
• Violence becomes a way of life
• The victim may also begin to believe that since the abuse worked against them it can also work for them if they exert the abuse onto someone else (e.g. victim may resort to abusing her children once the relationship is over)

What are the effects on the victims children?
Many women resort (or reason with themselves) to staying in a domestic violence relationship because they believe that it is best for the children - she or he reasons that their children need both parents. This is not always the case as some of the following effects on the children demonstrates:

• Children may suffer from emotional or behavioural problems from witnessing the violence. This can include nervous and withdrawn behaviour, anxiety, restlessness, bedwetting, etc
• May have difficulties sleeping, may have nightmares, worry constantly
• Children may have few social interests and poor performance at school
• Children are more at risk of suffering from the abuse themselves
• Children are also often used as a control tactic in the abusive relationship e.g. threatening violence against children, saying that the child is the reason for the fighting, abducting the children to punish the victim
• Children brought up in a violent household may believe that violence is okay and that it is the only way to resolve problems. They may also begin to imitate the abusers behaviours. This can result in anti-social behaviour, aggresive language, fighting, cruelty to animals and may in the future become abusive partners themselves

Effects on the victims family & friends

• Family and friends may feel helpless
• May also feel angry and resentful that victim lies about the abuse even though they see the bruises, or won’t leave the abuser, or keeps going back to the abuser
• Loss of relationship with victim.
• Victim may also have difficulties in communicating with children, families and friends because of trust issues or dis-regulated emotions)